Vox Newman

The Lollipop Rainbow Party | March 20, 2011

So, I was chatting with a chipmunk today and he said this bird he’d spoken with earlier was blathering about a moose she met who was moaning about the fact that he was invited to the party of the century by magical pixies and how he couldn’t make it.  The party in question was being DJ’d by Xaxthanol 6 of the Intergalactic Happiness Empire in sector 85192.4 and taking place at the Foam Nightclub in the old city district in Atlantis.

Xax is on her third Lollipop Rainbow Party tour and this is her first visit to Earth.  When asked about the party last week she was quoted as saying “Humans are a total upper, yo.  No one knows how to party like them.  My beats are gonna bring them to a whole new level.”

Last week’s party was a resounding success when Prince Hopple Bopple of the Third Friendship Imperium declared an amnesty for the Rebels of Sirius Major allowing them to attend.  But even their dourness was not enough to lower the readings on the Giggleometer.  In fact, several of their members were converted by the nuns of the First Church of the Intergalactic Giggle Orgy.

Of course, the moose in question was terribly upset and had a terrible fear of missing out because he was well aware of the epicly anxious fun to be had and that the Lady Penelope Spazmatastic Laugh Riot would be in attendance and she’s the most beautiful moose in all the Kingdoms of the Seven Suns.  It’s unknown why the moose in question couldn’t attend but I imagine it had something to do with pooping in the woods.

What is also unknown is if the Super Space Pirate, Gaggle Goose, would attend this event.  The last time she attended, she got so drunk on ambrosia and pixie dust that she vomited and it was this explosion of diamonds dust and pink sparkles from her gullet that blotted out the sentient dwarf star who was minding his own business in Starshine Nightclub’s VIT lounge.

The day is fast approaching and the pixies of Effin Ireland are working like mad little hatters, getting the mystical invisibility spell cast on the route to Atlantis so that the exclusiveness of this mega-event will remain intact.  If you haven’t received your golden invitation in your underpants drawer by now, I’m sorry to say that you’re going to miss out.  I didn’t get one and I’m super-bummed-out because it would’ve been so snapdazzle.  But, I’m just not cool enough.