Don’t miss it! Today only, the criminal underworld is having a garage sale: a market on the shores of the Black Sea. Setting aside their differences, members of the Yakuza, Triads, United Nations, Hell’s Angels, Russian and Italian mobs etc have put aside their differences to bring you this once in a lifetime opportunity.
Need spare pieces for a kneecap? Look no further. We’ve got everything you need, such as Sun Tzu’s lesser known work: the ‘Art of the Drive by’. If you’re in need of cash, all of our vendors can spot you: prime plus 1000.
Since I’ve restarted my blog, I’ve found myself reading more blogs and when I think about it, circa 2005 when I had my previous blog, I was also reading more of them. I don’t know exactly why this is but I suspect it has something to do with wanting to see what other people are sharing when you are sharing.
Recently, I’ve come across an interesting, seemingly connected thought process across several blogs, and I’ve been intrigued. It started with a friend’s blog: he’s been having something he’s referred to as March Madness (which has now bled into April as it seems that he knows many more people who are interested in bogging than I do) in which he has people he respects post entries on subjects they care about in his ’10 Things I’ve Learned’ format. The one I linked to started the ball rolling for me when I followed the guest poster to her blog. She had some interesting entries dealing with internet dating.
Jimmy here: sorry I didn’t return your text/email/call/tit flash in the club, but I was busy getting laid i.e. winning. I might get back to you later, if I need a booty call when my girlfriend’s out of town. She’s a model, so she goes out of town a lot which means that you might be winning sometime soon. Keep in mind though, that I have an epic contact list. Don’t worry, it’s not organized alphabetically, it’s ordered by the magnitude of what I imagine you can do with your lips.
Of course, making out with your girl friend can only help your case. But don’t think it settles matters: there’s all kinds of trampy ways for hot girls to get my attention. And really, that’s what I’m all about, getting attention: if you give me the right amount and I’m drunk enough, things will naturally progress from there.
So, I was chatting with a chipmunk today and he said this bird he’d spoken with earlier was blathering about a moose she met who was moaning about the fact that he was invited to the party of the century by magical pixies and how he couldn’t make it. The party in question was being DJ’d by Xaxthanol 6 of the Intergalactic Happiness Empire in sector 85192.4 and taking place at the Foam Nightclub in the old city district in Atlantis.
Xax is on her third Lollipop Rainbow Party tour and this is her first visit to Earth. When asked about the party last week she was quoted as saying “Humans are a total upper, yo. No one knows how to party like them. My beats are gonna bring them to a whole new level.”